Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

I’m sorry I didn’t get to write yesterday. There was this big, scary noise right before dinner and all the lights went out! Mommy said she wasn’t scared, but I thought I should curl up around her feet and not let her walk anywhere, just in case she might get hurt in the dark. Wouldn’t want her to trip over anything, you know.

Yesterday was a big day, though. First, I defended Mommy from the big rumbly thing in the hallway where she puts the stinky clothes; then, we went swimming in the big water bowl out on the porch!

…and then I got in trouble for swimming in the big water bowl. I like big water bowls. I used to swim in the big water bowl at our other house, but Mommy says no at this house. I don’t know why. Then Mommy made me stay out on the porch and sit in the sunshine until I got dry again. That wasn’t so bad. There was a big group of gophers out on the gopher course (at least, I think that’s what Mommy calls them), and I sat outside and watched them while I dried off.

Then, after I was dry enough to come inside, Mommy asked me to guard the clothes on the rack while she took a shower. I can do that! I am a good guarder!

But then I took a nap.

I didn’t mean to! I promise! I would have woken up if anything had happened. But it was just so comfy up on the big bed and it was so warm in the sunshine and it just… happened. I don’t know how it happened. When I woke up I could hear Mommy upstairs in the kitchen, but I didn’t smell any food, so I knew there wasn’t anything good up there. So I went back to sleep.

Mommy came back down a little while later and she smelled like hamburger! I love when she smells like hamburger! I don’t know how I missed the hamburger!! So I tried to get as close to her face as I could to get all the hamburger smell off of her and see if maybe she might have any on her face still… but she didn’t… and she made me get off the big bed.

Then she let me back up into her lap to watch a movie about this little boy who has this big white bird instead of a dog, and he can do cool tricks with his little fetching stick – like open doors and pick things up. But I think he needed a bath because Mommy kept saying he was Hairy. Poor little boy. I don’t like baths.

Daddy put a big blanket in my dog box for bedtime, and I decided to sleep in there last night. I never liked my dog box before, but I think I might like it now. I like my blanket. I had a good sleep and didn’t go jump on the big bed even once! I think that made Daddy happy in the morning.

This morning was not so good, though. Mommy sprayed my dog box with water to wash out my dirt. I liked my dirt. I tried to eat the water to keep it from touching my dirt, but then I got wet. And since I got wet, I got a bath. It was a sad morning.

AND, on top of all THAT, Mommy put my blanket in the big rumbly thing AND chased me with the loud sucky thing on a stick. Wherever I went, there it was too – eating up all my dirt and chasing away the fluff balls I pulled out of my toys. Sad morning. Sad, sad morning.

Now I am lying on the porch in the sunshine giving Mommy my evil eye look. Maybe if I am good and quiet, she will let me eat the fluff she keeps putting into that brown teddy bear she’s making. I like fluff. Fluff is my favorite.

Sloppy kisses!



(P.S. – To see the original sad dog diaries or sad cat diaries, follow these links.)


7 thoughts on “Dear Diary

    • IT IS!! I’m telling you, she can smell it. She gets a plush toy and the first thing she does is try to find a weak seam so she can pull the fluff out and play with it instead. Might as well just sprinkle a bag of the stuff all over the room. I’m crocheting a teddy bear right now and I have bags of fluff for that – and every time I get a bag out of the closet and start to work, she instantly perks up and tries to steal it from me. Every time. She’s a fluff-addict. She’s like Buddy the Elf in the doctor’s office eating the cotton balls. She does that with ear plugs too, which is gross.

      • Hahaha…I just busted my in-laws’ Jack Russell knocking over the trash can and eating the Kleenexes inside. Dogs are gross, but they make up for it with pure adorableness.

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